Never Steal a PBR

The last thing you want when you're sitting on your porch is some dick to steal your Pabst Blue Ribbon. The nerve of some people. Plus, if you're going to rob someone at least use a real weapon. Shit man, earn that PBR!
A Lincoln, NE woman was enjoying a few cold ones on her porch with a friend last Thursday night when she was approached by 35yr. old Nehemiah Winters who wanted a beer of his own. Twice the woman denied him so Winters figured he'd take one by force. What that force was I'm not sure because Winters returned with a fork and finally got his beer. At the time the female victim didn't know it was a fork. All she saw was Winters raise his shirt and point at a silver and black handle sticking from his waist band. It wasn't until police arrived and found the half beer and a kitchen fork in is pockets. Winters was booked on disturbing the peace charges and was released for time served. The story doesn't end there though, the wonderful folks over at Pabst Blue Ribbon heard about the story and decided to send over 60 beers for the female victim. How fucking awesome is that!? I'd also like to mention that I'm a huge fan of PBR and Old Style so if anyone feels so inclined I could make some room in the fridge for a few cases.
Journal Star has the full story