6.07.2016

Man Shits On Self-Checkout Scanner At Grocery Store


An Ohio man has been banned from a local Kroger grocery store after he was caught taking a dump on the self-checkout scanner. Maybe he just wanted to see how much his poo cost.
Colin Murphy, 23, was arrested in a Cincinnati suburb after he stripped naked in front of employees and relieved himself on top of the scanner. Employees told police he reeked of alcohol, had slurred speech and was stumbling when he entered the store. Police showed up shortly after and made the arrest. No reason was given as to why Murphy decided to shit all over the U-Scan It machine but my guess is the booze was a major factor. I can't say I've ever had the urge to get loaded and take a dump out in the open at a grocery store but hey, different strokes for different folks. Murphy was charged with disorderly conduct and public indecency and was told by the judge in his pre-trial hearing that he is no longer allowed at the Hyde Park Kroger. If he wants to take a shit at the grocery store he'll have to take his business over to the Food Mart. The article doesn't mention it but I'd like to believe the store ripped out the machine and burned it out back. I hope.
The Smoking Gun has the full story

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